Putting your Parent in a Care Home Against Their Will

Putting your Parent in a Care Home Against Their Will

 In Blog, Moving into Care, Nursing Care

Quick Answer: No, a person with mental capacity cannot legally be forced into a care home against their will in the UK. Adults have the right to make their own decisions about their care, even if family members disagree. However, if someone lacks mental capacity to make safe decisions, social services or the Court of Protection may need to intervene in their best interests.

Understanding Your Legal Rights

The question of whether someone can be forced into a care home is deeply personal and often arises during times of family stress. Perhaps your elderly parent refuses to move despite safety concerns, or a loved one with dementia needs more support than you can provide at home.

The legal answer is clear: you cannot force a mentally capable adult into residential care. However, the practical reality is more nuanced, and understanding your options is crucial.

The Mental Capacity Act 2005

This fundamental legislation protects the rights of all adults to make their own decisions. Under the Act:

  • Every adult is presumed to have mental capacity unless proven otherwise
  • People have the right to make decisions that others might consider unwise
  • All practical steps must be taken to help someone make their own decisions
  • Any decision made for someone who lacks capacity must be in their best interests

This means that if your elderly parent has mental capacity, their decision to refuse must be respected—even if you believe they need care.

When Can Someone Be Moved Into a Care Home Without Consent?

There are limited circumstances where a person into a care home might be moved without their active consent:

1. Lack of Mental Capacity

If a person lacks the mental capacity to make decisions about their care, others may need to decide on their behalf. This typically applies to:

  • People with dementia at advanced stages
  • Individuals with severe learning disabilities
  • Those with significant brain injuries
  • People experiencing acute mental health crises

A formal assessment by healthcare professionals determines whether someone can understand information, retain it, weigh it up, and communicate their decision.

2. Court of Protection Orders

When there’s disagreement about a person’s best interests or capacity, the Court of Protection can make legally binding decisions about where the person should live and what type of care they should receive.

3. Social Services Intervention

Social services may intervene when an elderly person is at serious risk of harm. However, they cannot force someone into a care home unless:

  • The person lacks mental capacity
  • A Court of Protection order is in place
  • There are safeguarding concerns requiring immediate action

Social services must always prioritise the least restrictive option and respect a person’s wishes where possible.

What If Your Elderly Parent Refuses to Move?

This is one of the most challenging situations families face. Your elderly parent refuses for many valid reasons:

  • Fear of losing independence and control
  • Attachment to their home and cherished memories
  • Misconceptions about care homes based on outdated information
  • Worry about being a burden or abandoned
  • Concerns about cost and what happens to their property

Steps to Take When Your Loved One Refuses

1. Have honest, empathetic conversations
Listen to their fears and validate their feelings. Ask what specific concerns they have about going into a care home.

2. Arrange a care needs assessment
Contact your local authority for a professional care needs assessment. This evaluates what kind of care and support your parent needs and explores all available care options.

3. Investigate alternative types of care
Before considering residential care, explore whether care at home could meet their needs:

  • Home care services – Support with daily tasks while they remain at home
  • Live-in care – Round-the-clock care in their own home
  • Personal care – Assistance with washing, dressing, and personal hygiene
  • Home modifications – Installing stairlifts, grab rails, or walk-in showers
  • Respite care – Short-term care to give family caregivers a break

4. Visit facilities together
If a nursing home seems necessary, visit together. Let your parent see the environment, meet care home staff, and ask questions. Many people’s fears diminish once they see modern facilities offer comfortable, supportive settings.

5. Consider a trial period
Some facilities offer short stays that allow your parent to experience the setting without committing permanently.

6. Seek professional guidance
A social worker can provide objective advice and help mediate family discussions about different care options.

When Is a Care Home Necessary Despite Resistance?

Sometimes, putting a parent in a nursing home becomes necessary for their safety, even if they initially resist:

Severe Cognitive Decline

When a person with dementia needs constant supervision to remain safe. They may wander and become lost, forget to eat or take essential medication, be unable to recognise danger, or require specialised dementia care that’s difficult to provide at home.

Read our guide on when someone with dementia should go into a care home.

Significant Physical Health Risks

When an elderly person faces serious risks at home: frequent falls without supervision, inability to safely manage medications, complex medical needs requiring nursing care, or malnutrition due to inability to prepare meals.

Caregiver Breakdown

When family members can no longer safely provide care due to physical or mental exhaustion, their own health problems, work and family commitments, or lack of necessary skills for the level of care needed.

Unsafe Living Conditions

When the person’s home has become hazardous through severe neglect, inadequate heating or sanitation, or environmental risks they cannot address.

Can Social Services Force Someone Into a Care Home?

Many families wonder about this. The answer is complex.

Social services have a duty of care to vulnerable elderly people. They can conduct safeguarding investigations, arrange assessments to determine what support is needed, apply for Court of Protection orders in extreme cases, and provide advice to families.

However, social services cannot simply force you into a care home if you have mental capacity and are making an informed choice to remain at home—even if that choice seems unwise to others.

In rare cases where someone is at immediate serious risk and lacks capacity, social services may need to take emergency protective action. This might include temporary placement whilst longer-term arrangements are made. This only happens when there’s evidence of significant harm or risk, the person lacks capacity to make the decision, and there’s no less restrictive alternative available.

Exploring Care Options: Alternatives Before Residential Care

Before putting your parent into care, thoroughly explore alternative types of care. Many elderly people can safely remain at home with appropriate support.

Home Care Services

Professional carers visit the person’s home to provide care and help with personal hygiene and dressing, meal preparation, medication reminders, light housework, and companionship.

Live-In Care

A carer lives in the person’s home, providing 24-hour support. This offers round-the-clock care in familiar surroundings, one-to-one attention, maintenance of independence and routines, and is often more cost-effective than residential care for couples.

At-Home Care Combined with Technology

Modern assistive technology can help elderly people remain safe at home through personal alarms and fall detectors, medication dispensers, video monitoring (with consent), and smart home devices.

Day Care and Social Activities

Day care centres provide social interaction and activities, meals and refreshments, basic supervision, and transport to and from home. This allows elderly people to socialise whilst returning home each evening.

Making the Decision: Key Questions to Consider

When deciding whether someone should move into a care home, ask:

About Safety: Can they safely remain at home even with additional support? Are they at immediate risk of serious harm?

About Care Needs: What type of care do they need now, and how might that change? Can those care needs be met at home with available resources?

About Mental Capacity: Do they understand their situation and the risks? Can they weigh up information to make a decision?

About Quality of Life: Are they isolated and lonely at home? Would they benefit from social interaction? What matters most to them about where they live?

About Family Resources: Can family members sustainably provide the care they need? What is the financial situation?

Legal Protections and Rights

Lasting Power of Attorney

A lasting power of attorney allows someone else to make decisions on behalf of a person who lacks capacity. There are two types:

Property and Financial Affairs LPA manages money, property, and bills. Health and Welfare LPA makes decisions about medical treatment and care, and can include decisions about where the person lives.

An LPA must be set up whilst the person still has mental capacity. Learn more about how to change your lasting power of attorney.

Deprivation of Liberty Safeguards (DoLS)

If someone who lacks capacity is in a facility and their freedom is restricted, DoLS ensure the restrictions are appropriate and necessary, the person is not being deprived of liberty unlawfully, and they have access to advocacy.

Your Parent’s Rights

Even when care home placement seems necessary, your parent has the right to be involved in decisions about their care as much as possible, have their wishes and feelings considered, receive the least restrictive care option, and challenge decisions through legal processes.

Approaching Difficult Conversations

If you believe your elderly parent needs to move into a care home, approaching the conversation with sensitivity is crucial.

Preparing for the Discussion

Choose the right time and setting in a comfortable, private location when your parent is well-rested. Gather information about care options, costs, and availability first. Involve other family members to ensure alignment.

During the Conversation

Listen actively and allow your parent to express their fears. Validate their feelings and acknowledge this is difficult. Focus on benefits like professional support and social activities, not just problems. Be honest about specific incidents that have led to this conversation. Involve them in decisions about what matters most to them.

After Initial Resistance

Give them time—this conversation may need to happen over weeks or months. Suggest visiting facilities, as seeing them firsthand often reduces fear. Propose a trial stay to help them adjust gradually.

Read our guide on coping with a loved one in a nursing home for additional support.

Financial Considerations

Cost is often a concern when considering whether someone should go into a care home.

Your parent will need to pay for their own care if they have savings above £23,250 (in England) or property they own (with some exceptions). For more details, see our comprehensive guide: Are next of kin responsible for care home fees?

If your parent’s assets fall below the threshold, the local authority may contribute. Read more about who pays for elderly care.

In some cases, the NHS may fully fund care if health needs are the primary reason. Learn about funding for nursing homes.

Supporting Yourself Through the Process

Making decisions about putting your parent in a care home is emotionally draining. Don’t neglect your own wellbeing:

  • Set boundaries around caring responsibilities
  • Ask for help from other family members
  • Take regular breaks from caregiving duties
  • Consider counselling to process difficult feelings
  • Remember you’re doing your best in a difficult situation

Many adult children experience guilt when considering care home placement. Remember: you’re ensuring your parent receives appropriate care, professional care may be safer than struggling at home, you can still be actively involved, and making this decision shows love and responsibility.

How Lidder Care Can Help

At Lidder Care, we understand the complexities of these difficult decisions. Whether you’re exploring homecare options or looking for the right care home, we’re here to support you.

Our Services

Care Homes

Both facilities provide person-centred care in comfortable, welcoming environments with experienced staff dedicated to residents’ wellbeing.

Home Care Services
We offer comprehensive in-home care options that may allow your parent to remain safely at home, including visiting care services, companionship care, medication assistance, and meal preparation.

Specialist Support

We offer free consultations to discuss your family’s situation and explore whether care at home or residential care is the best fit.

Contact us:
Phone: 01623 622 322
Visit our contact page

Whether you need immediate support or are planning ahead, Lidder Care provides compassionate guidance and practical solutions tailored to your family’s unique situation.

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